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Monday Morning Jokes 5
Back on track with the 5th edition of the Monday Morning Jokes, I hope it will be funny, cause i m not a such a good mood, between a b@#$%^ who stole my bin, an ... (did not find a name to qualify him) who chickened out and an ex friend that i still can t forgive arffffff to heal myself i did something that Keshi was thinking on maybe doing :) for the 5th time for me ;)
Anyway here are the 3 jokes u have a bonus one since I did not post jokes last monday:
The Wrinkled Nightgown
A man and wife were celebrating their 50-year anniversary, so the man bought his wife a $250 see-through nightgown. Later that night she was getting ready for bed and realized the nightgown was still in the box downstairs. Walking naked through the house, she passed her husband who said, "My word, for $250 they could've at least ironed it!
Respectfully Cheating
Jack and Betty are celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary.
"Betty, I was wondering -- have you ever cheated on me?"
"Oh Jack, why would you ask such a question now? You don't want to ask that question..."
"Yes, Betty, I really want to know. Please."
"Well, all right. Yes, 3 times."
"Three? When were they?"
"Well, Jack, remember when you were 35 years old and you really wanted to start the business on your own and no bank would give you a loan? Remember how one day the bank president himself came over to the house and signed the loan papers, no questions asked?"
"Oh, Betty, you did that for me! I respect you even more than ever, that you would do such a thing for me! So, when was number 2?"
"Well, Jack, remember when you had that last heart attack and you were needing that very tricky operation, and no surgeon would touch you? Remember how Dr. DeBakey came all the way up here, to do the surgery himself, and then you were in good shape again?"
"I can't believe it! Betty, I love that you should do such a thing for me, to save my life! I couldn't have a more wonderful wife. To do such a thing, you must really love me darling. I couldn't be more moved. When was number 3?"
"Well, Jack, remember a few years ago, when you really wanted to be president of the golf club and you were 17 votes short?"
Chastity Belt
A man decided to march in the holy crusades. Concluding that his wife should wear a chastity belt while he is gone, he locks up her nether regions and gives the key to his best friend. He tells him, "If I do not return within four years, unlock my wife and set her free to live a normal life."
So, the husband leaves on horseback and about a half hour later, he sees a cloud of dust behind him. He waits for it to come closer and sees his best friend. "
What's wrong," he asks.
"You gave me the wrong key!"
The video of the day (hilarious btw): 'You have an attitude'!
U take care People and have a not too bad Monday ;)
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27 people read it till the end and comment on it ;):
yeyyy Cess' monday morning jokes r bak!!!
LOL all of em r great!
**Chastity belt
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA was the best!
Hv a good week ahead Cess MWAH!
Keshi.
Hilarious! The Respectfully cheating and the Chastity belt was awesome!!
Have a great week ahead!
Cheers,
Shravan
hey hey.. m already waiting for next moday :-)
cess back on the track rocking :P..heheeh....
i am on the floor rolling ...hahah...my god....hahaah....
all of them rocked :)...heheh...they r simply rocking :D....rock on the week sweetie
urs..hemu..
rofl on the wrong key and the 17 votes...
Oh my god!!!!!!
the chastity belt and the wrong key...lol
ur mmjs are awesome..I hope ur mood has returned to normal by now....
chastity belt rocks and so did the first one :)
cheers Cess :)
Here come the interesting jokes of Cess. :) The last one was simply the best. I m havin a gr8 monday coz i took an off from work today!! So i hope hav a g8 week ahead.
lol @ last one...hahaah
yaaayy jokes or on..
lol
hehe the video was just great..lol
hope u r having a lovely day over there.. take care.. huggzzz
WEEELCCOMMEE BAACKK!
back here again:D
though I read it on a monday night, it still made me laugh..
@ keshi
Hi dahlin, happy u like it
tc
C.
@ Shrav
glad u like it, have a good week too
cheers
C.
@ sawan
don t have to much expectations, it might not be always funny :)
thanks for passing by
C.
@ Hems and Chris
glad u like them guys ;)
take care
C.
@ τ ħ€ ĐάЎđяёάmёя
++ ur mmjs are awesome..I hope ur mood has returned to normal by now...++
thanks sweetie, as for my mood, it s not that quite ok for now ;(
C.
@ preeti
hi sweetie, happy u like them ;)
take care
C.
@ ria
hey girl, i should have a take a monday of or at least call sick, i had better day, and i seriously hope my week will get better ;)
tc
C.
@ Frenchy Cutie
glad u like it hon
tc
C.
@ Ani
hi, finally somebody like the video ;)
My day sucked as for the days before since i came back from holidays, need to go to France asap
u take care
C.
@Abhinav
hey, thanks for wishing me back ;)
cheers
C.
@ Praveen
happy i can make people laugh on monday evening ;)
cheers
C.
Cess wuts wrong girl? WInter blues I guess..I so wanna wish its that cos I dun want u to tell me ur leaving blogville too?
**the envy to do nothing, like blogging, lost the envy to do it, is it useful for me? is this therapy to vent out everything really working? i m not sure anymore, my creativity is at level 0, don t feel as funny as I used to be. It is like something is missing in my life, i don t find a reason to live happily, for what? for who? I did not find a purpose to it.
Somehow that hit home. Cos I feel the same way right now. I dun feel as funny as I used to be...mebbe I'll find my funnybone tmrw but rite now Im as blue as a fuckin smurf...
*HUGZ* wutever it is, u know Im here for ya dahlin. email me whenever u want ok? TC n be bak soon!
Keshi.
o and I forgot...
**to heal myself i did something that Keshi was thinking on maybe doing
so wut was it that u did Cess? cos I'd be doin Murder! And u? LOL!
Keshi.
now is my sweetie ok from the winter downs or not...or i have to catch a flight to dublin now :P...come back sweetie :)..
urs..hemu..
check my latest post, and especially the BIKINI dog's caption!
MWAH!
Keshi.
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