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Monday Morning Jokes 2
Welcome to the second edition of the Monday Morning Jokes, I hope u like the first and the second one will be even better :D Today is a special International MMJ. Well technically it is still sunday here, BUT it s already Monday in India :)
Talking Italian
A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
''Emma come first. I come. Dennis come and Dennis come again. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a-more.''
''You foul-mouthed swine,'' retorted the lady indignantly. ''In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public.''
''Hey, coola down lady,'' said the man. ''Imma just tella my friend howa to spella Mississippi.''
The Blonde Joke:
There were two blondes as roommates and they both bought mice. When they got home the first blonde said, "How are we going to tell them apart?"
The second blonde said, "Why don't we take one and chop off one of its legs?"
But during the night the mouse with four legs said to the mouse with three legs, ''That's not fair -- I want three legs too.'' So the mouse with three legs told him to eat one of his legs. And so he did.
The next morning the blondes were upset about this so they did the same thing as the day before. But again the mouse with three legs ate one of his legs. This went on until both mice had no tails and legs. Then one of the blondes shouted, ''All right, that's it! You take the black one and I'll take the white one!''
The video: Talking like an Italian in English
Tomorrow tuesday I have my first Humorous Speech Contest, I m stressing a bit, though I won t be able to participate to the next round since i m going on holidays, so I ll just do it for fun then :)
Have a gre8888888t monday guys!
Talking Italian
A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
''Emma come first. I come. Dennis come and Dennis come again. I come again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come once-a-more.''
''You foul-mouthed swine,'' retorted the lady indignantly. ''In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public.''
''Hey, coola down lady,'' said the man. ''Imma just tella my friend howa to spella Mississippi.''
The Blonde Joke:
There were two blondes as roommates and they both bought mice. When they got home the first blonde said, "How are we going to tell them apart?"
The second blonde said, "Why don't we take one and chop off one of its legs?"
But during the night the mouse with four legs said to the mouse with three legs, ''That's not fair -- I want three legs too.'' So the mouse with three legs told him to eat one of his legs. And so he did.
The next morning the blondes were upset about this so they did the same thing as the day before. But again the mouse with three legs ate one of his legs. This went on until both mice had no tails and legs. Then one of the blondes shouted, ''All right, that's it! You take the black one and I'll take the white one!''
The video: Talking like an Italian in English
Tomorrow tuesday I have my first Humorous Speech Contest, I m stressing a bit, though I won t be able to participate to the next round since i m going on holidays, so I ll just do it for fun then :)
Have a gre8888888t monday guys!
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32 people read it till the end and comment on it ;):
hahahahahaha @Mississippi joke! I hv heard of it before and each time I read it I just crack up like a maniac. lol!
All the best for tmrw Cess! u'll be right. ur TOPS u know that!
:)
Keshi.
hehe ;)
best of luck for tomorrow dear :D
rofl hahahahaha...misssissippi was awesome ...blond jokes as always :P hahah...
all the best for tmmr cess...i know u wud rock it up..:)..
urs..hemu..
P.S: hey i have a jokes blog pass by wen time permits..www.hemujokes.blogspot.com
Haha
Had heard the first two...but the italian video was good...
sonofabyatch :)
hjehe.. speech competition for showering humor topics? thats awesome.. all the very best for that.. thats great indeed
would love to be a part of competition like that.. come up with a post on your experiences on that
and all the very best for the competition and also have a great trip
great ones cess....
mississippi one was too good..blondes are always blondes..!!
the italian thing was a new one to me ..and enjoyed it to the core...
monday jokes are getting better...
humorous speech competition..good luck friend..you gonna rock..!!
:)
LOL.. they managed to make me laugh, and i really like that on a monday morning :-D
bestos for the speech...
ROFL:) Blond jokes are in the same vein as in India Sardarji jokes:)
best of Luck for today !
are u going again to france?
Mississippi
oh my god ..that was way greater than hilarious....
lol
it's very good of u to do sumfink so beautifulmaking us fresh on monday morning...
god bless ya
@ Keshi
Hi sweetie,
Thanks for the wishes, hope it will work.
tc
C.
PS: loved ur last post hon :)
@•♥•♥Vicky♥•♥•
Thanks dude :)
C.
@ Hemanth Potluri
I m glad u re laughing on monday morning.
Thanks for the wishes
C.
PS: I ll pass by ur joke blog
@ceedy
he he, this video is pretty popular, I like it too, I m working with some italian friends, and they do have a similar accent :D
C.
@ Chriz
++ would love to be a part of competition like that.. come up with a post on your experiences on that++ it s part of the Toastmaster International Club i m in, it s great cause u can practice ur speech, gain confidence i met great people
++and all the very best for the competition and also have a great trip++
Thanks, and for my trip it s only in 23 days, but still thanks :D
@Vinz aka Vinu
++monday jokes are getting better...++ thank u, I m happy to put a smile on people face on monday morning :)
++ humorous speech competition..good luck friend..you gonna rock..!!++
I hope so, thanks for the wishing :)
C.
@ --xh--
++ LOL.. they managed to make me laugh, and i really like that on a monday morning :-D++
I m glad u like it, and really happy to make people smile on monday
Thanks for the wishes
tc
C.
@Renu
++ROFL:) Blond jokes are in the same vein as in India Sardarji jokes:)++
Tell me one joke about India Sardarji but first tell what is Sardarji :D
Thanks for the wishes
I m not going to France, well not until the end of the year, i m going to Mexico :D I m so looking forward.
@ τ ħ€ ĐάЎđяёάmёя
My friend i m glad u like, make me happy to put a smiley on people face :D
tc
C.
ha ha ha the audio was awesomeee...
@descrying the shadows
he he, are u smiling open mouth so i can see ur teeth ;D
hey! made my day erm evening :D :D
@Winnie the poohi
he he , at least I made something :D
Cheers
C.
superbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
Cess i am copy pasting the jokes and mailing my frends n cuzzins? okay? I need ur permi!
:D
@Swats
++Cess i am copy pasting the jokes and mailing my frends n cuzzins? okay++ sure, spread the laugh, that s the best thing to do he he :D
Cheers
C.
hahahaha.. you made a monday night enjoyable!
Mississippi (did I spelled right?) was really awesome...
Super coool!
so how was the competition..?
Okay girl! that was funny!!! Even the blonde joke!! hahahah I am glad that all of us blondes dont have moments like that! haha
well I do sometimes.. but that dont count right????
@Abhinav
++ hahahaha.. you made a monday night enjoyable!++ i m glad u like it, i m happy i made ur monday night enjoyable :)
tc
C.
@ Vinz aka Vinu
It is supposed to be tomorrow, but i m not gonna participate, cause i was not feeling good today, so i haven t prepared enough my speech and i don t feel funny enough to do it :(
C.
@ CALM B4 THE STORM
++ Okay girl! that was funny!!! Even the blonde joke!! hahahah I am glad that all of us blondes dont have moments like that! haha++
he he :D
++well I do sometimes.. but that dont count right????++ no that does not count, u re special :D
Glad to have u back here!
tc
C.
I've replied to u in that post sweet Cess...go read it. And I want u to stay DETERMINED no matter wut. U'll see real results only when u give urself TIME and hv alot of PATIENCE.
*HUGZ*
Keshi.
hehe i loved the mississippi joke. it was soo cutee.. hehe
i hope ur contest is going good.. am sure u'll rock..
so were r u heading off for your holidays..
huggzz
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