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- Waiting end of August to be back to France and see my family...

- 'Summer' is almost over here .... ;(

- It is migraines' week.... ;(
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Can you clic on the Apple Sir?

It is 2:30 in the morning, i m going to France in several hours now, and I can t sleep, don t ask me why I don t know, no I know why, I just need some holidays! So since i m awake, I m doing a post. So, I remembered reading a post on Swats' blog about Call Center, and how tough it can be to work for it and why people are doing it just for money. After my master degree s because my English really sucks by that time (FYI: I m French for those who did not know), I moved to Philadelphia then Cincinnati for a year to learn English. When I came to France a year later, I could not find any job, they told you know 'u did a diploma for the jobs of Tomorrow' ok how about today? Due to our lack of new technologies by that time, and the fact that I was bored not doing a job, I moved to south of Ireland to work as a Technical Support Agent ;) One year and 6 months, I did it as much as I could, it was not a job for me, so not a job for me. I had some fun, but most of the time my best friend was the 'mute' button, the one where u can hear the client but he can t hear swearing! So I thought I can share a some souvenirs with u to see how 'fun' it is to answer people who spent 2000 euros in a computer and don t know how to use it ;)


Call 1 [uk customer]:
ME: Welcome to [...], my name is [...], may I take your name please.
Client: j... [ he spoke so fast that i did not heard his name] I have a problem with Final Cut Pro [software]
ME: FCP is supported by the Enterprise department, before I can transfer I need your contact details Sir
Client: Transfer me to Enterprise [using a tone like he does not give a shit anymore of what i m saying]
ME: Sir, I can t transfer u to Enterprise If i don t get your contact details
Client: y do u need that, transfer me to enterprise
ME: Sir, as I said [mute: 3 times already u son of b....! / mute off: nice voice] No contact details No transfer [ sometimes the shorter the better]
Client: Thanks for being a pain in the ass
ME: [with the nicest voice ever and just before he hang up on me] You are very welcome Sir ;)
[ In UR FACE!!!!!!]

Call 2 [French customer around 70 years]:
Client: I have a problem with my machine, it freezes
ME: all right sir, can you click on the Apple menu [mac computer, Apple menu= start in windows]
Client: what apple
ME: the blue apple in the top left corner of your screen
Client: wait, I m looking for it
ME: [ mute: OMG, I m gonna spend an hour with Grandpa now] Did u find it?
Client: One minute young lady, I m old and almost deaf and blind i need time
ME: [mute: did I say one hour!!!!!!!!]
Client: AH! I found it, what do I do
ME: click on it
Client: Hold on, it s not a blue apple
ME: [mute: OMG!] what do you mean it s not a blue apple
Client: nope mine is yellow
ME: [mute: seriously! is blind or color-blind] Sir, there is no yellow apple
Client: I m telling u sweetie mine is yellow, wait... ah.... no there is some red as it s like a rainbow apple
ME: [ mute: AHHHHH!!!!!!] All right sir, the rainbow apple means that you have Mac OS 9 on your computer [ which is like Windows 95, really old version] let me transfer you to the right department [mute: YES!!!!!]
Client: thank u sweetie
He was a nice client at least we had some... sometimes.



Call 3 (uk customer):
ME: how can I help you sir
Client: I don t want to be rude with you but may I speak to somebody who has a better English
ME: [mute: U are rude u b@#$%!] I m sorry Sir but I can t transfer u to an other agent, u can hang up and call back if you want, u might be routed to Greece or Bangalore call center [ see call 4].


Call 4 (uk customer):
Client: where I am?
ME: TEchSupport
Client: is it in Ireland?
ME: yes
Client: Are u sure
ME: [mute: wait, let me check outside, yep yep it s raining like hell, i m definitively in Ireland] yes Sir
Client: no because I was on a phone with Bangalore I can t understand this
ME: what do u mean?
Client: the accent, they have a weird accent [mute: oh poor thing, grrrrrr]
I used my worst french accent during the rest of conversation ;)


Call 5 (uk customer):
ME: how can I help you sir
Client: may I speak to a technician please?
ME: you are speaking to a technician
Client: no I mean a 'male' technician
ME: [mute: you b@#$#% f#%#$^ arffff, i case u haven t heard the expression 'Excuse My French' well here I am, we do have a huge vocabulary in terms of swearing words ;)] Well, unfortunately sir, I can not transfer u to a male technician, u have two options : u can hang up and call back, but i might be available again and u might have me again OR I can fix ur problem in 5 min, it is really up to u
Client: Fine!


Last one [uk customer, old lady]:
Client: yes I m calling because UPS went to my home for the delivery but i was not there, they told me I have to call u
ME: all right Madam, I m gonna take your details and we ll see what I can do for u
Client: thank you
[She gave me her details number, I can t find her in our systems]
ME: I can t find you, can you tell what kind of computer is it
Client: computer?
ME: yes for the delivery
Client: oh no no no, It s not a computer, it s a rocking horse
ME: I m sorry what?
Client: yes a rocking horse for my grand daughter birthday!
ME: Madam, this is a technical support, we do not sell rocking horse
Client: Oh really [mute: yes Really grandma!] oh i m sorry sweetie, can you give their phone numbers then for the rocking horse [mute: no I can t grandma, i m a TECH support]
ME: i am really sorry madam, I do not have this number, you should call back ups
Client: no worries, thank you my love
She was a really nice lady anyway ;)
As i said there is some good and bad memories in my work as a techsupport, spending 8 hours on the phone each day is not healthy and not wealthy either. Now when i arrived at work and I see the phone, I m glad i don t have to wear the headphones anymore, he is a part of the furniture on my desk now ;)
Have you been working on in a callcenter and had a funny experience with a customer or have ever called a callcenter and talk to a rude agent?

17 people read it till the end and comment on it ;):

τ ħ€ ĐάЎđяёάmёя said...

lol


u had a wonderful experience :P

lol

last nite..I had a talk with a customer service..they started like..sir u r our golden customer..so we have a offer...sir we want ur prepain to be maid post paid..for absolutely free plus u can call anywhere from the phone and we will provide initial 1000 min talkitime...i said yeah sure...whho can miss a 1000 min talktime...then he gave to his superior..he said that 1000 is for only 2 days and that too i have to call only to phones of my service providers..so i said thank u and I hung up :P


lol funny people....

so wat do u do now???..and btw if I m not there in time...happy journey for france....

Cess said...

τ ħ€ ĐάЎđяёάmёя
LOL, 1000 min for 2 days ;) My mum is worst when she has a salesguy like that on the phone, it did not even start she already said 'i m not interested, thank u' and she hang up ;)
I m working for an internet company, big name (but secret ;), search quality ;)
thanks, i ll have fun for my french trip!!!!!

Renu said...

OMG, its really
hilaarious:) thoroughly enjoyed the post:)
see old peoplea are nice:), may be slow:)

Bon Voyage !

au revoir!

--xh-- said...

call center jobs are never easy - have many friends wrking for many firms - from international giants to local companies, and the tales they tell is almost same.
now all the tales do look hilarious, and I do had a good laugh, but when you are at the receiving end, you seldom find them funny.
I have a friend who is wrking in tech support - i will direct her to ur blog :-D

have a safe journey and enjoy ur vacation.

Winnie the poohi said...

hey!

I am anoops friend! I couldnt help but smile and yeah and commiserate with you too!

They come in all types dont they?

Did you ever get I-am-a-stud-I-flirt-with-females-of-any-kinds kinda men ?

Or.. this small part of conversation always stays with me somehow..

I had this customer who I talked with all nice and pretty.. issue solved and all.. he asked me where I am from.. I told him from india *company policy*

He was like you dont sound indian.. almost like american.. I was like thank you sir and all

and then he said something now... "Oh I dunno.. if I was an indian.. I would like to sound like an india"

I was like What the F! Who wants to roll their R and talk in stewpid nasal tones anyways.. ofcourse the fone was in wrap up :D :D

Cheers!

Swats said...

Call 1- Awesome..way to go girl! This is the best way 2 deal with profanity and criticism

Call 2-hehehehhehehehhehehehehhehehehe this was truly hilarious..u cud give me lessons in patience!

Last Call- rocking horse hehehhehehehehhehehehhe

What a rocking post Cess…It made my day! thank God ur out of it..wht u doing now?

Cess said...

@Renu
Of course old people are nice, usually they were the nicest!
Thank u for the 'Bon Voyage' I will enjoy it ;)

Cess said...

@--xh--, yeah i m laughing about it now, but i was not laughing at time, seriously not, except for the granpa with the apple and the grandma and the rocking horse!!! ;)
and i ll definitively enjoy my holidays ;)

descrying the shadows said...

HE he he ... well your experiences made my day for sure .. di
but you know it s atough job isnt it ... like for the waiters .. no matter hw rude and jack@#$ the customer is smile ... In call center at least you are invisible :P

Cess said...

@Winnie the poohi
Yeah I got the French guy who asked if I wanted to have drink with him, he thought I was working in France not in Ireland. But I had sometimes the "What a charming voice, are u russian? nah. American? nah'
There is indeed all kind of types. I just remember, when I gave my resignation letter, one of my last call was a grandpa as well:
Cl: are u a technical agent?
Me: no, I m the housekeeping lady, nobody was here, i heard ring so I pick up the phone
Cl: really, I don t know if u re gonna be able to help them
Cl: I might u know i m vaccuming each night so I heard the agents talking
Cl: yea, but no offense u seems a nice lady but it s difficult
Me: All right sir, I m kidding i m a tech agent
CL: really
Me: yes
Cl: of I feel relieve now, I was a bit scared u know, but it was a nice joke ;)

REally cool grandpa, and thanks for passing by ;)

Cess said...

@ Swats i m glad u like, as for the patience, trust me, It was the best learning school for that, cause I was not the type of patient people before, u better be with them!

Cess said...

@ descrying the shadows u right about the waiters, I don t know how they do it, and sometimes unfortunately because they had a jackass before, then are not that nice with the next customer ;(
Thanks Bhai ;)

Cess said...

@Swats, oups i forgot, I m working for an Internet company (big name) but secret ( i ll have to kill u if I tell u what i m doing ;))))))

Vicky said...

hahahahahhaha Cecile....this really was a good read :)..im gonna blog abt my take on this too ;)

Cess said...

@ Vicky
Welcome on board ;) glad u like it ;) Can t wait to see ur next post on it ;)

Cheers

C.

Abhinav said...

he he he
Yes I can understand that people like to harass call center people with stupidity...!

Cess said...

@ abhinav
so true, still don t understand why they would spend that much amount of mmoney if they don t know how to use the freakin machine!!!!!!!

tc

C.